POSTED 01/01/2018 16:49
It's been a long time since I last showed myself. I've been on a lowkey, living like a normal human being until... Well, let me start from the beginning.
Got married to the love of my life last month and a couple of things had to change. We left the rough neighborhood we used to stay - where everybody knew me, to a residential area - a place suitable to groom responsible children in as my wife put it.
We have been living in the new house for about a month now, going about our business which included variety of activities to ensure that children start coming ASAP, after all, that's what we are in this expensive apartment for.
Yesterday, I was rushing to leave for work when my landlord's wife excused me.
"I have not seen my husband's clothes that I hung here to dry" She said pointing towards the rope that was tied close to our window.
I was surprised why she would even ask me that.
"I don't know anything about your clothes" I responded as I checked my time and made to move towards the exit of the compound.
She blocked my path.
"Ever since you people came to live in this compound, my things have been missing one by one.” Her voice was loud now.
I was dumbfounded. How did this even start? My neighbors started coming out, it was a big compound. I ignored her and made a move towards another direction, she held my hand and I suddenly turned.
“Woman what?!” I yelled in her face to frighten her.
That did not give me the desired effect as she landed the full force of her right palm on my left cheek. The pain from the slap was more psychological than physical. Such nerves! I looked at her through slit eyes, she hurriedly removed her head tie and tie it around her waist, placed her hands at akimbo and started tapping her right foot. My neighbors at a safe distance were making silent gestures. Some shrugged disgustedly, others snapped both fingers over their head.
I stared hard and long, my eyes shooting daggers as I was holding my cheek.
Then she said “What are you going to do?”
Suddenly, I left her and ran back into my house. I heard her laughter and the silent discussions from my neighbors had grown into an audible chatter.
I got into the bedroom, my wife woke up just as I stepped in. She was tired from the other night so I didn’t want to wake her before I left for work.
“Honey, you are still here?” She asked in her sweet voice as she stretched and yawned at the same time. Then she noticed. “Why are you holding your cheek?” She was wide awake.
“The landlord’s wife slapped me” I replied gruffly.
“Oh my God!” She was suddenly alarmed. “Hope you didn’t do anything to her?” She asked anxiously.
“No” I answered knowing what she meant.
She thanked God and rushed out. I followed her slowly back outside. I knew what she was up to. When I stepped outside the landlord’s wife was on the ground, on her belly, my wife was holding her down with her right hand and beating her bumbum with a flower cane in her left hand. She’s left-handed. The neighbors were now laughing and cheering.
I left for work making a mental note to buy something for my lovely wife.
When I returned in the evening, the first thing was to present her favorite wine and thank her for fighting my battles but then I saw her face.
“She did this to you?” I asked as I touched her swollen right eyelid gently.
She scoffed. “Can she? It’s after you left her husband came back and used me as a punching bag, dragging me all over the comp-” She stopped herself. “Honey don’t worry, I am going to be al…” I was at the door already and I banged it hard.
In split seconds I was at the landlord’s flat. I flew through the steps that led to his porch and kicked in the door. The door flew off its hinges and landed deep inside his sitting room. The landlord, who was alone, stood abruptly as I entered. In two strides I reached him, then gave him a slap and he flew in the air and crashed into his TV set at the other end of the room. In a breath I was on him, my right hand digging into his throat.
“How dare you touch my wife?! Do you know what I am?”
I spat in a voice I’ve not heard in a long time.
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